Greetings. People, it seems, are in short supply at many organizations. You can't reach them by phone, you don't see them face-to-face. We'll talk about this customer service nightmare, and we'll talk about why businesspeople speak like idiots.

Let's get started.

Cordially,

Harry Hoover
harry@hoover-ink.com
Ink Briefs
Sometimes you need to know what buzzwords mean so that you can understand what businesspeople are talking about. For instance: "air cover." When a senior manager agrees to take the flak for an unpopular decision, while someone lower in the chain of command does the dirty work. As in: "The CFO will provide air cover, while you reduce staff by half." (A term borrowed from the military.) Find more buzzwords here.


Buzz marketing - like so many trendy ideas - is in danger of becoming ineffective through overuse. Wharton has a good article on the subject, but it requires registration to read.


There's a new, disruptive technology out there that allows basically anyone to start a pirate radio station. It's called podcasting and it may be the death knell for music radio. Like TiVo, podcasting gives listeners the technology to listen to what they want, when they want. RAIN, the radio and internet newsletter, is a good source of information if you want to learn more about podcasting.


Getting mentioned in a blog is a good way to extend your network and garner traffic to your website. But pitching a blog is not like pitching the media. It requires a different sensibility. PRSA has a timely article on this subject. Here are a couple of blog dirtectory links that will help you find the blogs catering to your market.

Blogwise

Technorati

BlogSearchEngine




About Hoover ink PR

Hoover ink PR helps position businesses that are serious about their success. Then, we craft and deliver bottom line messages that ensure it.

Who are we? We're a marketing communications firm with more than 25 years experience in providing services to financial, high tech, real estate, tourism and consumer products companies.

From employee relations and media relations to collateral material and e-newsletters, we develop the programs and communication tools that will differentiate you from your competitors. And that's the bottom line.

 
  Hook Me Up With a Human
Oh, what has happened to the carbon-based organizational interface?

Many organizations have digitized humans - aka carbon-based units - out of existence in their customer service operations. Now, I love digital technology as much as anyone, but it is time to bring the people back into their appropriate customer service roles, don't you think? (Got a customer service horror story to share?)

Have you ever tried to reach a human at Amazon.com? When I last checked you couldn't even find a telephone number on the website. Just to annoy them, here is their toll free number: 800-201-7575.

Many organizations don't even have a live person answering phones. They dump you directly into voicemail. If this happens to you, punch "0" immediately. Some systems are programmed to ignore the first three "0s" so keep punching. This almost always gets you to a sentient being. OK, sentient may be a little strong. At least they are breathing. Sometimes if you hit the * key, you'll be sent to the company directory.

The Society of Consumer Affairs Professionals in Business reports that in a recent survey of 1,000 people about customer service "can't find a human" was at the top of the list of things participants disliked. The study further showed that calling a toll free number was still the preferred method of reaching a company, but more people are turning to the web because no one appears to be home at the phone. The society has published an online directory containing a lot of contact information for many top companies. Use it frequently.

Here are a few other tips for hunting down a human. Try using the Whois directory. However, truly cunning companies have removed their contact information from this, too.

Companies who continue to shirk their responsibility to their customers eventually will pay. Customer retention rates will spiral downward and new business will dry up. At least, I keep telling myself this will happen to these bad PR poster children.

If you call me, unless I'm on fire or talking with a client, I'll answer my phone. And, if I somehow miss your call, it won't take me 24 hours to get back to you. It's bad PR to do anything less.
  Say What?

Once again I'm a day late and a dollar short with my book idea: Why Business People Speak Like Idiots. Brian Fugere, Chelsea Hardaway and Jon Warshawsky have already written it, but it is not out yet.

Why was I thinking about writing this book? Several news releases crossed my screen that made me wonder if perhaps a new secret language was being used and I didn't have the code. See what you think:

"Freely accessible by the entire OSS community, PatentCafe's Open Source Software Patent Search Engine adds significant value to IBM's contribution by accelerating the integration of IBM's patented technology into the marketplace, helping to foster worldwide interoperability standards."

"An integral part of Sun's ongoing effort to provide developers with robust Java application development support, Java BluePrints for Wireless is a collection of end-to-end best practices, guidelines and architectural recommendations that demonstrates how to best utilize the strengths of the J2EE(TM) and the J2ME(TM) platforms to build a distributed, transaction-oriented enterprise application using J2EE on the server and J2ME on the client."

With a little help, I'll bet you, too, could add significant value by leveraging your robust end-to-end technology and thus foster worldwide interoperability.

The authors of Why Business People Speak Like Idiots rightly say that "bull" has become the official language of business. I say that corporate speak is akin to what is happening in customer service: the humanity is being taken out of the equation.

Fight the "bull." When you are writing news releases, letters, or even emails, break through the clutter by putting candor and personality into them. If you need help with bullfighting, download this program that helps identify and eliminate corporate crap from your messages.